Stop Picking on My Clients!

I'll admit it. I talk to myself.

More to the point, I talk, scream, and jump up and down at inanimate objects that bring me bad news.

Like this morning.

I represent this 18 year old kid. Sweet guy. Graduated from high school this past spring, doesn't cause any trouble, listens to his mom, and keeps his ears clean.

On a balmy spring evening last March, sweet kid is walking with his sweet kid friends, minding their own business. Officer Friendly sees these kids minding their own business and he thinks he needs to shake things up a bit. Must have been a particularly slow night in the Republic of Portland. After Officer Friendly engages my poor client in an illegal stop, my kid admits he has "quite a bit" of marijuana in his backpack.

A couple of notes for those of you who don't practice law in Oregon...

1. Our search and seizure law is good and it is getting better all the time. Our Supreme Court doesn't care what SCOTUS says. We're in Oregon, damn it and we do things our own way. Pioneering spirit and all that. Hell, we've got a whole wagon trail named after us!

2. This is Oregon. More importantly, this is Portland. I think I might be the only person in Portland who isn't getting baked on a nightly basis. OK, that's maybe an exaggeration. Point is, we don't care that much about pot in this city!

I've had this case since I took over another attorney's case load in May. In August I filed a kick-ass motion to suppress evidence. No reasonable suspicion to stop my client. No reason to demand his ID. Unlawfully extended stop. All the good stuff.

The DDA kept setting the case over. He's going to file a response to my motion. Yeah, right. In all my time as a PD in this city, I have never had a written response to anything from this DA's office.

This morning, I got my response via e-mail. "Dear Miss Conduct: Plead out your client now or we'll go back to the grand jury and we'll reindict him for much, much worse. Love, DDA."

I screamed at my computer.